It was Christmas Eve, and even though he didn't believe in much he still celebrated all the holidays. He knew what a special time this was for everyone. Most of the other years it was just an excuse for a party, to drink and then sleep comfortably curled up in a corner of the ship once everyone had passed out in their respective corners or beds. He'd lurched outside with a bottle still in one hand, wiping at the corners of his eyes.

Zoro wanted to think.

It had snowed the night before and the result was crunchy half-snow, half-ice that wasn't comfortable to walk on but it looked pretty. There had been a full moon the other night, too, and as the moon had slowly cast its glow on the ice he found himself thinking of her eyes. The snow had a light blue tint, almost purple. Glowing, the hint of the moon touching the shining ice, it looked like her eyes when she got angry. Her eyes changed according to her moods and he was fascinated by them. It wasn't very manly or strong to be wobbling all around someone, gushing romance filth out by the ton. After awhile that grew to be old...very old. How could you trust someone who always lavished you with too much praise for every little thing? So the swordsman never told her. He just thought about it on nights like this.

He looked up at the sky and grunted. Zoro had a vague feeling that his fiancee was giving him more than he gave her. She would, he thought sourly. Because he still had something to accomplish and that came first. Stupid cat hadn't told him she understood but she knew - he was a package deal. The big man sighed wearily and looked away from the heavens. Damned fool he was sitting here, half-leaning over the railing with a bottle in one hand. Moody, thinking thoughts better left to themselves... must be that shitty eggnog. Who knows what kind of crap got slipped into it this year. Well, the rum would take care of that. He drank deeply, throwing his neck back and taking several large swallows. The alcohol burned all the way down, leaving a pleasant little trail of warmth that spread into his belly.

Christmas meant the new year was coming soon. And New Years meant they had been engaged for...eh. Awhile. He shrugged it off but was counting the next minute, frowning as he tapped his fingers on the rail. Seven months since June? Or did that make it eight? That was a long time and they still hadn't decided when and where. He imagined that bothered her but she'd never said anything about it. They couldn't do anything about it until he was finished with his first oath. She respected that. In turn, that made him respect her more. It was one of the reasons he'd asked her in the first place. His thoughts drifted again, coming back to why he'd asked - it had caused him a lot of hassle and everyone was always bothering him about it. But she smelled good and felt right under his hands and body. She didn't always agree with him, but when she did she stood by him like the others...and then some. She went the extra mile, not only helping him win the fight but taking care of all his needs afterwards. The big man blushed suddenly. No one else had ever touched him. Not that way. He was stronger than the rest, he hadn't needed "that kind" of female companionship. It was a willpower thing and he had lots of that.

Or so he'd thought.

He was always getting teased about running from that damn fool Marine wench, but she didn't make him weak. She just looked like his dead friend. How could you strike with intent to kill or even injure someone like that?! So he ran. He didn't like it, but he did it. He'd like it less if he cut her down and it reminded him of that day, so long ago, but with him the one responsible. That wasn't weakness. How many times had he argued with the stupid cook about that? Zoro knew weakness. It was in the playful tug that stupid cat gave his earrings, the gentle touch of her hands on his chest, tracing the scar she seemed to like. She could make him forget where he was for awhile. That reminded him of what track he'd been on before, and he blushed anew. Their first time had been a shock for him. It wasn't as if he was immune to female blandishment, but hers was different.

He guessed that's was one of the reasons why they were together now. The next year would be interesting, he thought to himself as he walked slowly back inside.